Monday, February 23, 2009

Policy stress...

The snow is back in flurries. The streets look lightly dusted. It’s still February, so I guess the weather shouldn't’t be a surprise and I have no right complaining. After all, I am living in Canada. Today started off late for me. Thursday mornings always do because I sleep in. I like that part of the day, but some of the people I deal with are challenging. At least I know when to expect them. Being aware of who or what is ahead seems to make life more tolerable....sometimes. In other ways, being “blissfully unaware” is a blessing. We are forced to deal with any circumstances that come our way regardless of what we expected from life.


I had trouble sleeping last night. This week has been stressful, especially with policies and procedures related to my life every day changing by the minute. I’m trying not let politics bog me down, but when they impact every part of my day, how can I “go with the flow?” The person who helped me to get ready for my day this morning seemed agitated over policy changes. She is the person who is making my life the most challenging. I am not the one who requested all of this upheaval. She did. I need what I need. I will never be able to walk, shower, get to the bathroom, or change positions independently. Therefore, I need help. If that help can be offered to me in the simplest, safest, possible way, I’m all for it. Don’t, however, make my life and that of everyone who is paid to help me unnecessarily complicated. Life is complicated enough without willingly adding stress. When the person assisting me today started to complain, I tried to stay as quiet as I could. What do you say when you want to do is ring the person’s neck? There is nothing to say.

I am getting tired of gossiping, living in the center of a battle and constantly having to defend my rights. I just hung up the phone with the manager of my attendant care. He told me that “everyone gets a turn to fight their own battle and now just happens to be yours,” keeps ringing in my ears. He’s right, but I’m ready to give up my turn.

- ocg

1 comment:

THE OBSERVER said...

never do that hun and I PROMISE I won't.