Friday, December 25, 2009

Happy Christmas!

Last night I went to visit my family at my sister and brother-in-law's house. Luckily, I was able to get a ride at the last minute. I surprised my family, which was fun. Arriving late, I showed up with a coffee in hand and hopefully a big smile. Only my sister knew I was coming. Candles lit the house beautifully. My twin came and it was great to catch up. He's amazing.....My brother-in-law's mother also joined the dinner. I don't often see her. She's a bit socially awkward. As soon as I saw her, I complimented her on her hair. I think it made her a bit edgy. At the end of the night, my brother in law played the piano. He's quite good. I kept requesting all the long difficult carols. It was funny. Being that my brother-in-law's mother is a librarian, I tried to talk to her about books. My sister had made yummy appetizers. I ate about a pound of prosciutto wrapped in figs. We had a yummy chicken dinner with sticky toffee pudding for dessert. Mom also made cookies with cranberries and nuts. I ate three. My pants are tight. Why am I not surprised? I have a bit of a cough. Fortunally, it hasn't damped my festive spirit. Talking about my cough, I asked my Mom if coughs mostly come out at night. When she noodd, I said, "Kind of like misquitoes?" My sister laughed. Logic can be funny.

Part of me really wanted to go to church alone last night. I wanted to say a prayer. A difficult time is ahead and I am going to need strength. I am worried about the Observer. Loneliness sucks. How can one lose a best friend and NOT be lonely? There will be tears and long, solo days. There will be times when memories are painful. Love is beautiful, but for every one of life's joys, there is polar heartache. Reality hasn't sunk in. Once Christmas is over, life will change. The right decision often breaks our hearts - just as much as the wrong one does. Christmas Eve is once a year. I will have lots of opportunities to pray in church. I binged on food last night. I regret eating so much. Maybe it was habit. Maybe it was stress. Whatever the reason, today's Christmas. My prayer for the future is to have just enough - enough love, friendship, forgiveness, challenge, family, happiness and time. I wish this for you too.



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